Wanting to Stay Home, What Would YOU Do?

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by Jon Haynes Photography

Question by Emma&Laura’sMumMum: Wanting to Stay Home, What Would YOU Do?
I am completing an internship as an elementary teacher. I graduate in May and my husband and I always planned on me working. We have plans for a house and live in a two bedroom home now. After I had my daughter in October, I realized I would love to stay at home. After many heated discussions, my husband decided to apply for another job. His job now just barely pays our bills and after graduation I will have student loans in addition. He has not heard ANYTHING from the other job yet and it has been a month. There really are no other prospects. What would you do. I have such as desire to stay hom with her. I cried for the first two months of her life having to take her to the sitter (starting when she was 2 weeks) and still do cry every Monday morning. I really just don’t know what to do. My hubby is great, but just has a high school diploma and can only work labor jobs.
PS I would love to have four children, but I just don’t think I can go through the trial of leaving another one. *SIGH*

Best answer:

Answer by amykissinger
Look into babysitting another child or two. It pays surprisingly well. Good luck– I feel for you.
XOXO

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11 Comments

  1. Sparrow
    Sep 6, 2010

    Well, since you wanted to be a teacher you were already going to be dealing with a bunch of kids… Why not start a day care or something similar to that, so you don have to leave home..and still be bringing in an income?

    Also with your education you could work at a preschool..perhaps a preschool your daughter could attend?

  2. Lynn T
    Sep 6, 2010

    You could find another mom or two who is working and needs someone to care for her young one… You could undercut current childcare rates by just a bit (they’re insane) and stay home with your little one. That way you stay home, but your still bringing in some income! Granted, you’d have an extra tot or two, but at least you’d be there!

    You could also get technical and become certified to be a childcare provider (if you really want to go all out). But this can be a real inconvenience, depending on what state (or country) you live in. Technically this is what you’d have to do, but I guarantee there’s moms out there who would do things the old fashioned way.

  3. Sarah
    Sep 6, 2010

    Why dont YOU look into what it would take for you to become a babysitter. they get paid very good, and it sounds like you do well with children, hints the elementary school teacher. that might be something you would enjoy actually. If not, there are other jobs you can do from your house…i mean even selling things online can bring in a pretty good income if you get serious about it…its always something you can look into. Also there are a lot of jobs you dont need a college degree for…a lot of managment positions are available, even in the food industry, my sister works at a resturant called mcalisters and they pay 40,000 a year for the manager..she gets a little over 30,000 as assistant….i mean, there are a lot of opportunities.

  4. Artie Lange
    Sep 6, 2010

    the daycare idea someone else said is a great idea, sounds perfect for you.

  5. Dudley
    Sep 6, 2010

    What a hard situation you and your husband are in! Could your husband work his schedule in a way that would allow him to be home during the day while you’re teaching? Also, I bet you could get a job at a daycare/preschool, which may allow you to bring your daughter. Or – try babysitting a couple kids in your home. Make money and take care of your daughter at the same time. Good luck!

  6. bsmile
    Sep 6, 2010

    i in the same situation and i just had a baby i miss working but i dont trust daycares and the grandmother have no cars do what best for you and your family

  7. Logan's Mommy
    Sep 6, 2010

    I stay home with my son and it’s the best thing in the world. I couldn’t imagine having to take him to daycare every day. I quit my job when I was 8 months pregnant and although we’re not rich, we’re getting by pretty well. My husband also has only his HS diploma and works a labor job, thankfully he has a good one! My advice to you would be if possible, just set a very strict budget and stick to it. Try to pay off any bills that you can while you’re still working (car, credit cards, etc). If that still doesn’t leave you with enough money to live comfortably, then maybe you could get a job in the evenings…like maybe as a server? I know it wouldn’t pay well and your education would allow you to get a better job, but it’s some money and the schedule would be right. I don’t know. My friend is in the same situation as you and her husband just joined the Army reserve. Theyll have to move every 5 years, but he’ll get paid well, get good benefits, and she can stay home with her daughter (and any future children). Good luck mama!

  8. mystic_eye_cda
    Sep 6, 2010

    1) Just because he “only” has a high-school diploma doesn’t mean he can only get crappy jobs. I know plenty of people without a highschool diploma that make more than my husband and I stay home
    2) Applying for one whole other job is hardly looking for a better job
    3) Its not forever its just until the kids are old enough that you don’t mind leaving them or they are in school
    4) You could baby sit, dog walk, etc to work from home
    5) I bet there are a whole bunch of expenses you could cut

  9. Rachel O
    Sep 6, 2010

    It’s a tough decision. Trust me, as a working mom of two (son, 2 years, and daughter 6 months, born 10/9/07), I can tell you that it’s not easy to go back to work. I definitely felt like I had to go back to work, I am an attorney and I have student loans with higher monthly payments than our mortgage! In my experience, nearly all working moms go through the same thing when returning to work, anxiety, crying, depression. (Taking your baby to a sitter at 2 weeks would be hard for any mom, stay-at-home or working – - it’s just too soon to be separated!) I highly recommend the book Milk Memos, it captures the emotions of returning to work. There is no wrong decision, so no one can tell you what to do. There are are a lot of good reasons to stay home and to work–other than the money–your children will be inspired by you, you will be following through on your goal, to teach. My husband is a teacher–the great thing about teaching is you will have long breaks to be with your children. If you decide to teach, be sure to get the support of other working Mom’s, your friends, family, on-line (here!).

    Good luck!

  10. silverl1ning
    Sep 6, 2010

    I feel the same as you, i cant bear to leave my 11 week daughter with anyone, so i dont. My Husband and i manage to live on one wage, i would gladly give up the ‘wants’ in life to stay at home with my Girl. It would kill me going to pick my daughter up from daycare to be told she said her first word or took her first step. If i were you id stay home with your baby, she needs her mum!

  11. mom0410
    Sep 6, 2010

    as teacher you have SO many options! even becoming a tutor at home. you can give private one-on-one lessons to students, help them with homework, prepare them for upcoming tests, SAT, etc. there is a great demand for tutors (check your local papers). i have a friend who teaches at home on weekends. she is not even a real teacher. you can teach for a couple of hrs a day while your husband can stay with the baby or take her for walks. I have a 13month old and still can’t leave her. My husband doesn’t have a degree and works a labor job as well. We just manage to live on a very tight income. Good luck!

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